60+ Roasts For Skinny People

Roasts for skinny people are some of the funniest, most savage, and oddly specific burns you’ll ever hear and if you’re here, you’re either looking to dish them out or dodge them like a paper-thin ninja. Either way, you’re in the right place. Whether it’s your twiggy best friend or that one pal who disappears when they turn sideways, we’ve got the punchlines locked and loaded.

Get ready to laugh, gasp, and maybe even steal a few zingers for your next group chat. These aren’t your average roasts they’re tailored, teasing, and served with just enough spice to keep things friendly (but savage).

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NASA Just Called: They Lost a Stick Figure

These are the type of roasts that might get you reported to NASA for mistaking your mate for space debris. Caution: may cause orbit-level laughter.

Bro, if NASA found your body, they’d launch you to Mars as a new type of probe.
You’re so thin, when you turn sideways, you legally disappear.
You make chopsticks look like protein bars.
I’ve seen receipts thicker than you.
If you fell through a crack in the floorboards, we’d have to call a plumber, not a medic.
You ever consider modeling for “Before” pictures in a cereal commercial?

Roasts Only Best Friends Can Survive

No one roasts you better than your best friend and that’s how you know it’s true friendship. Blessed by Allah almighty, but also lowkey bullied on the regular.

You so skinny, even your shadow’s like “Nah, I’m good.”
I’d hug you, but I’m afraid I’d break a bone… yours.
If I lost you in a crowd, I’d only need a sheet of paper to block the view.
Your hugs feel like being attacked by a hanger.
You were born in 4K Ultra Thin.

Comedy Night Material That’ll Have the Crowd Crying

Time to arm yourself with some roast battle gold. These punchlines are perfect for your next comedy night or spontaneous backyard roast session.

You so light, mosquitoes don’t even bite you they just land for a nap.
You walked through a car wash and came out drier.
You sneeze and do a backflip by accident.
Your BMI is a decimal.
You’re the only person who can hide behind a toothpick.

Stick Figure Humor That Sticks the Landing

Got a friend who looks like a doodle from 4th grade math class? These stick figure humor gems are just the shade they didn’t know they needed.

You look like someone drew you with a blunt pencil.
Even your stick figure drawing needs to gain weight.
Bro, a stiff breeze could draw a more detailed outline than you.
If you stood next to a ruler, you’d lose in thickness.
You could walk through prison bars and not even turn sideways.

Skeleton Jokes That’ll Rattle Their Bones

These jokes go straight to the bones literally. Skeleton jokes are the perfect cocktail of playful teasing and mild concern.

You don’t have abs, you just got ribs that sparkle in the sun.
You so bony, hugs from you come with a spine massage.
If you swallowed a marble, I could trace it like a game of pinball.
Halloween ain’t even scary when you’re around.
You look like you cosplaying a biology textbook.

Weight Jokes, But Make It Wholesome

We’re walking the fine line of safe roasting tips here. These ones are more “aww” than “ouch,” but still pack punchlines harder than your skinny pal’s handshake.

You’re so lightweight, Siri refuses to track your steps says it’s unethical.
Your diet plan consists of existing.
Even helium’s jealous of how floaty you are.
You sit in a bean bag and fall through it.
If you ever got kidnapped, they’d use a ziplock bag.

Mom-Level Roasts Because Why Not?

Sometimes the best witty insults hit with that mom energy firm but confusingly loving.

My mom said I should feed the hungry, so here, take this sandwich.
Even my mom’s old broom has more curves.
You out here looking like a hanger for mom’s old prom dress.
My mom looked at you and said, “That child needs soup.”
You’re so thin, my mom asked if you’re a fashion mannequin on break.

Short Roast Lines With Big Bite

Size doesn’t always matter at least not with short roast lines that deliver nuclear-level burns in five words or less.

Wind chimes got more meat.
Skeleton called, wants its bones back.
Cardboard envy you, bruh.
Hoodie looks like a tent.
You hide behind floss.

Gentle Roasting Lines That Won’t Ruin The Vibe

If you’re not tryna make your friend cry into their non-existent lunch, these gentle roasting lines are exactly the kind of social etiquette win you need.

Love how you’re eco-friendly zero mass, zero waste.
You’re the human version of Ctrl + Z.
You bring nothing to the scale. Literally.
You light up a room… with your outline.
I admire your commitment to invisibility.

Body-Related Humor That’s Light Like Air

This is body-related humor that’s got the airiness of popcorn and the flavor of spicy nachos. Light-hearted but a lil’ savage if you squint.

You ever get lost in your own jeans?
You wear skinny jeans like they’re cargo pants so much space left.
Your belt got no job.
Your ribs be out here moonlighting as xylophones.
You so slim, a mirror’s confused.

Funny Body Comparisons That Sound Made Up (But Kinda True)

We love a good comparison that sounds like a fever dream but hits too hard. This section’s all about funny jokes for skinny people that don’t even feel like real sentences, yet still work.

You thinner than the WiFi signal.
Seen thicker spaghetti noodles, no lie.
If you were a font, you’d be Arial Narrow Italic.
You got less volume than a whisper in space.
You so slim, snakes mistake you for cousin.

Boundaries, Sensitivity, and the Roast Code

Listen roasting, especially when it touches on body types and physical appearance, ain’t a free-for-all. Let’s not lose friends over a punchline that hits below the belt (or above the ribcage, in this case). So here’s the gospel truth:

Always roast with love, never with malice.
Don’t roast someone about something they’re insecure about unless they literally started it.
Keep it playful, not preachy.
Know your audience some folks laugh, some might shrink into their seat like a deflated airbed.
And remember: comedy is best when it feels like a group hug, not a verbal suplex.

Let’s Hear Yours Roasts for skinny people

So that’s 60+ roasts hotter than your skinny friend’s metabolism. Which one had you howlin’? Got a better one? Drop it below or tag your friend who gets blown over by strong compliments.

Friendship jokes are the seasoning of life, and humorous responses like these? They just prove you love each other enough to giggle through the burns. Share, laugh, and remember: Allah almighty gave you a squad. Make ‘em laugh ‘til their cheekbones (and ribs) hurt.

Now go forth and roast responsibly.